CRUSH
We all have several truths in life. Some turn into facts and
some remain our point-of-views. The facts are usually relevant to every other
person of the same age group, gender, or sexuality. Something common that we
share with strangers. Isn't it weird and amusing at the same time?
In those facts, there is one fact. We all have had a crush
in our lives. No matter who we are. No matter how old we are. No matter how
rich or poor we are. No matter what gender we belong to. Nothing matters. It is
a universal fact, that every human being has had a crush in their lives, even
if it’s just once.
If you go telling me that you haven’t had a crush on another
human being even once in your life, do you know what I’ll say? I’ll just laugh.
I will laugh so loudly on your face that even France will hear me.
I exaggerate
sometimes. You’ll have to deal with it.
So anyway, having a crush is not worth being ashamed. It
just means that you are sane and there still is some hope for humanity. Having
a crush is beautiful in its own way. Hey, I’m not saying that it’s not painful
at all. But don’t you just (sometimes) love the feeling of warmth in your
heart? Don’t you just that you’re able to love?
There are many types of crushes. Some turn into serious ones
while some are just for fun. No matter how much the density of a crush is,
you’ll behave the same for that person at least for some amount of time. After
that it depends on how much you are into them.
1.
You
will stalk them on Facebook (or other social media):
It always starts with Facebook, doesn't it? So, there’s a
person you like. Sometimes it just starts with how pretty or handsome they
look. You naturally want to know more about them other than their good looks.
You want to know what they like, how humorous they are, what do they like to
eat, what their hobbies are, etc. How will you get to know? Talking to them?
Pfft! Yeah, right!
You will never have the balls to ask them personal questions
unless you’re really confident. What do you do? You stalk them on Facebook and
find out what they’re like through their status, pictures, posts, yada, yada.
Or, if you want to talk to them and your tongue sticks to
the roof automatically when you try to start a conversation, you try to talk
though your fingers. You text them on Facebook. You can lie to him/her about
yourself, you can laugh in front of him/her even if he/she isn’t funny, and
whatnot. Honestly, you talk better through your fingers than your mouth.
2.
You
will listen carefully to whatever nonsense they’re talking about:
You want to look good before your special one, right? You
will always listen to them carefully even if you don’t agree with them. You
will nod your head time to time even if you’ve zoned out and are thinking about
your future kids. You’ll just say yes to whatever they have to say. I am not
saying that it’s right. It’s not.
Although, it’s not totally your fault. Your brain is trained
for survival instincts. It will send the messages it feels fit according to the
situation. At that time, you want that person in your life more than food. You
will automatically do what feels fit for getting that person. You forget about
yourself. You forget that it’s not what you really want.
3.
You
will always try to be around him:
You want a chance with that guy. What do you do? Try to
catch his attention. If you succeed, then you try to always be around him. You
don’t like not being with him. You always invite him to parties, movies, family
gatherings, funerals. You never leave a chance of being alone with him.
I remember trying to go on alone walks and other places with
my crush. We used to be together so much that people used to mistake us as a
couple. I sometimes wish it were true.
4.
It
will be a big deal when he appreciates you:
Do you remember those shriek moments when your crush says
that the dress looks good on you? “Hey, you look stunning today!” or just the
expression when he checks you out? You say that it’s not a big deal, you
already know that you’re stunning. But your heart beats like a maniac when you
experience that.
You will wear more of that outfit because you know that he
likes it on you. I still remember that one time my crush checked me out. Like,
actually checked me out. It will create a new hope in you. That feeling is
amazing!
5.
You
will smile much more:
Don’t you love that feeling when you remember something he said earlier which really made you
laugh or smile? No matter where you are, a bus, a party, a funeral, you will
smile broadly at that thought. Your heart does a weird dance and that makes you
smile instantly. It’s like, you go in a flashback and never want to come back.
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I remember that time when that used to happen to me. Okay, I
am going to quit lying. I still have that feeling. Many of the times I got glares
and confused looks by people around me. “Are you okay?” they’d ask me. I’d tell
them what I just remembered. They’d just shake their heads. After a while, they
got used to it.
There are many types of crush. Fictional, infatuation, best
friend crush, and whatnot. Even I had crush on many people. Some of them were
friends, some fictional, some movie stars, but for some time I used to think
that we really connected, and I thought it may turn into love. Stupid, right?
Having a crush on someone is painful and I know that. But it’s an inevitable
part of your life.
You can’t deny it. You can’t stop it. You shouldn't regret
having a crush on someone. In the future, you will think of that person and
laugh at your choice. It’s natural. It actually shows that your mind, body, and
heart are still functioning.
There is a fine line between having a crush and obsession.
Having a crush is totally healthy. On the other hand, being obsessed with
someone can turn out to be dangerous at some point of time. When you have a
crush on someone, the most you can do is stalk them on Facebook. Stalking them
personally? Well that’s obsession.
Well, let’s state the obvious, shall we? This won’t make
them fall in love with you. Instead, it will push them away from you. This
obsession can be really harmful. People even end up killing others for that. If
you want an example; watch the Hindi movie starring Shah Rukh Khan, Dar, or an English movie, Crush.
Fact: obsession takes place when a person can’t get the
other. They end up hurting their ego and hurting many people in the way.
My advice: Have a crush. Fall in love. “Aww” and “Oooh” at
their pictures. No problem in that, but you must know when to stop. Now, you
may ask, ‘How do we know when to stop?’
The answer is really simple: Whenever you start crying for
them. Just stop right there, because shit just got real. Try to move on after
that. How to move on? Keep asking/reminding yourself if it will be as good in
practical as it sounds in theory. Maybe it’s just the idea of being together
attracts you. Maybe when you do get together, you won’t like them. What if you end up hating them? You won’t
like that!
Start with just deciding that you have to get over that
person.
After that, repeat this mantra: It’s just the theory I like,
and not the practical.
Start focusing on important things. Do you want your entire
life to rotate around just one person? There are things more important than
love. Like, chocolate, or food! Just kidding. There are other things, too. Your
career, passion, dreams. You want to focus on that now.
Love is a part of your life, not life itself.
If you still can’t move on,
you’re screwed!
A crush on a best friend is the most painful one!
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